The HyperTexts
Elham Sarikhani
Elham Sarikhani is a writer and thinker whose work dwells in the borderlands
of shadow and light. She explores exile, silence, memory, and the fierce
beauty hidden within suffering. Blending lyric intensity with reflective
clarity, her poems and prose move between the intimate and the collective,
tracing wounds, reckonings, and the fragile endurance of hope. With a voice
both raw and contemplative, she writes for those who refuse false healing and
seek instead the difficult clarity of truth.
The Charter in Ruins
They drafted treaties as men lay brick in winter,
with fingers
losing feeling,
with the stubborn faith that a wall, however flawed,
still alters the wind.
No one alive mistook the thing for holy.
Ports were shelled. Borders
were chewed open.
Signatures dried beside fresh graves.
Yet some shame
remained in the room.
Even thieves, entering by candlelight,
lowered
their voices before the icons.
Now the new rulers grin with all their teeth.
They do not bother with
curtains.
They drag the bloodied furniture into the square
and call the
crowd closer.
Listen, they say. History is only appetite
with medals
pinned to it.
A charter lies on the table
like a letter from a dead relative,
wrinkled, formal, bearing witness,
unable to rise when the door is kicked
in.
Around it gather men with manicured hands,
men who speak of order
while oiling the hinge of the cell,
men who can pronounce “security”
as
though it were a blessing over a knife.
What kept the brittle frame upright
was never innocence.
No, not innocence.
A handful of empires, tired for an hour,
found
advantage in self-restraint.
They called that virtue.
The smaller
nations, hearing the word,
placed their thin bowls beneath it
and waited
for rain.
Then came the long education in impunity.
A city burned here, and an
exception was issued.
A prison filled there, and a spokesman adjusted his
tie.
An ally crossed the line with tanks,
and the line was redrawn in
softer ink.
Children learned geography from evacuation routes.
Mothers
learned to gauge the weight of powdered milk
against the weight of a child
who did not wake.
This is how law begins to die,
with a series of well-tailored
permissions.
A clause loosened for convenience.
A veto used as a veil.
A tribunal starved of teeth.
Soon enough the maps begin to sweat.
Rivers
turn watchful.
Wheat listens for artillery.
And the clever ones, always the clever ones,
explain that force is only
realism,
that conscience belongs to smaller countries,
that the century
has no patience for scruple.
They speak as though mankind were livestock
and fear the fence.
Meanwhile the poor bury the evidence by hand.
A father folds a blanket
no body will warm again.
A girl carries a key to a house
that now opens
onto weather.
In the camps, evening descends without opinion.
Soup
thins. Generators fail.
The old continue coughing through the night,
which is one form of citizenship left to them.
Still the paper remains.
Stained by every hand that used it badly.
Even so, there are sentences on it
that remember a better measure of power.
They murmur that a state is not a god.
That conquest has a smell and leaves
a residue.
That the dead do not vanish when buried under jargon.
A time may come
when exhausted people, not pure ones,
not victors,
simply people who have seen enough ruin
to grow severe about mercy,
will ask it for something harder.
They will know the law cannot love
them.
They will ask it for something harder,
a boundary against the
fever of rulers,
a public weight laid across the hands
of men who
mistake permission for destiny.
Until then the world goes on
with its briefings and drone feeds,
its
polished murder, its profitable sorrow.
And somewhere, beneath the
speeches,
beneath the anthem and the market bell,
the old question keeps
striking the ribs:
How many bodies must be stacked
before power remembers it has a face?
Another Day, in the Language of the Abyss
I never meant to stay alive
this long.
No, life was never meant to be an inheritance.
It was a wager,
and
I would have gladly lost it years ago.
It has been a wild ride, yes,
but
not the kind the poets sing about.
It was a ride through storms that had no
sky,
through rooms where even gods refused to knock.
I have been beaten
by
days that were too long,
and nights that were too honest.
And yet, through
it all,
I kept my dignity
not the dignity of pride or reputation,
but the
kind that survives in secret, unobserved.
I kept my curiosity,
not as a
virtue,
but as the only lantern
I could afford in the dark.
I am tired now.
Tired in the marrow,
in the weight of my breath.
I deserve my exit,
not as
a gift,
but as a simple, overdue wage.
There is no regret.
There is no
remorse.
I have been enough.
I have stood in the fire without flinching,
and that is a life,
whether or not the world knew how to name it.
And yet
this morning,
when the light came bleeding through the blinds like an
accusation,
I opened my eyes.
And I lived.
Another day.
Not because I
was rescued,
but because I have not yet decided
that the abyss
should have the
last word.
Vow of Love
I do not cling from hunger;
I offer my full
presence.
I speak what is true,
but never with the blade of contempt.
I
remain
when remaining dissolves
the self I cherish.
I depart without
hatred;
your story stays safe
within my silence.
If my truth shatters
what
you built,
I will help rebuild
if you wish it so.
The Night I Became
the Monster
In the trembling alleys of childhood,
where the sirens of war
bled through prayer,
I learned to dread the silence between dreams,
for
in that silence the monsters marched.
Grotesque, endless, they passed before
me,
their shadows clung to my waking breath,
and I, a small soul,
hid
trembling behind the brittle laws of the righteous.
Yet one night,
a
strange fire stirred in me,
a hunger, a defiance,
perhaps even the
whisper of God’s cruelty.
I stepped from hiding,
arms open,
and the
monsters entered me,
not to tear me apart,
but to dwell,
to become my
marrow,
my secret strength.
From that hour I understood:
evil is not the
Other,
it is the mirror refused.
The abyss does not kill;
it waits,
asking if you dare embrace its gaze.
Call me monster, if you must.
I am no
longer afraid.
The darkness within me is not my chains,
it is my
freedom,
my proof that I am whole.
The Beast’s Final Bargain
Every beast
knows its price;
wisdom is to pause before paying.
I was born without a
tomorrow.
The world sold futures like cheap icons,
but I had no patience
for their painted saints.
The beast in me saw through it,
only the raw
breath of now was real,
each day a solitary rebirth,
each hour a small
crucifixion.
But to live this way is to live beside a cliff.
The beast does
not only hunger for life;
it dreams of release.
One breath and I could
vanish,
the whisper is always there,
a door just ajar at the edge of
thought,
inviting me to step through.
Others weave their lives with plans,
I sit at the table with nothing but the present,
and the knowledge that I
could rise and leave forever.
This is my freedom,
and my torment.
For
decades I have burned like this,
intensity as prayer,
exhaustion as
sacrament.
Each dawn a wager:
stay or go,
grasp the day or surrender
it.
And still I remain,
my beast crouched in the shadows of my ribs,
pulling both toward life and toward the abyss.
This is the truth polite men
cannot bear:
to live fully is to be always near the void.
The more you
seize the moment,
the louder its silence calls you home.
Yet I endure.
Each breath a small rebellion,
each step a refusal of the final exit.
One day I will pass through that door,
and when I do, it will not be
defeat,
but the last gesture of a life lived without remainder.
Until then,
I stand at the edge,
beast and man alike,
choosing life,
today and
only today,
even as the void waits,
one breath away.
Look at Me Dance
to My Exit
I have danced with my monsters,
with my saints,
with the
shadows of every name I wore.
I no longer dance for applause,
this is
the movement of a soul unbound.
All my contradictions,
the beast, the
lover, the architect, the god,
circle me now,
not as enemies but as
echoes.
I am whole. Look at me:
I dance without fear,
without
control,
without needing to be understood.
The curtain falls, but not in
defeat,
only in grace. This is my exit,
not a tragedy but a celebration.
I burn,
I bow,
I vanish,
leaving behind an echo
the universe will
remember.
The Comedy of Goodbye
Love is an untimely guest,
it arrives
uninvited,
builds its altar in your ribs,
then insists on tragedy at its
exit.
No quiet departure for love;
it demands blood,
demands silence
that lingers like smoke.
I met him in the theatre of my twenties,
where
passion was currency
and slogans our only inheritance.
His eyes were
like peace promised but never delivered,
his soul already tuned to the
pitch of martyrdom.
Loving him was impractical,
like falling for a
character already written for myth.
Every tragedy needs its villain.
Ours
came on motorcycles,
not with speeches but knives.
They butchered him at
noon
as though cutting out an overlong chapter.
I was there.
Before,
during, after.
More than most ghosts can claim.
No orchestra swelled.
No
cinematic farewell.
Just a hand on his chest,
his eyes staring past the
edge of the screen
into whatever waits beyond the curtain.
Exit stage
left.
Final act.
The heart that once beat for paranoia and poetry
was
silent. I did not check his pulse.
I did not scream.
Wilde was right,
to die for one’s country is an old lie.
To die for an idea, older still.
And yet, was it not hilarious?
That freedom devoured its own believers
with such impeccable timing?
Grief is not dramatic.
It is tedious.
It
sits with you in cafés,
follows you down the same street
where
everything broke.
I never avoided that place,
to forget would be a worse
insult
than remembering.
I skipped the funeral.
Funerals are theatre for
the living,
a farce of flowers and borrowed prayers.
I’d already said
goodbye when it mattered,
while he was still warm,
while blood still
meant something.
Time does not heal.
It dresses wounds in lace
and calls
it recovery.
So I moved forward not because I was healed
but because the
alternative was absurd.
We all say goodbye eventually,
in unanswered texts,
doors closed too hard,
or in my case,
a boy bleeding on a street
where the revolution never came.
The tragedy was real.
But my God,
the timing, pure comedy.
The HyperTexts