The HyperTexts

All Gay Today

by Zyskandar Jaimot

According to the cognoscenti, all the world's and America's 'great' leaders have been GAY. The latest in the list is Mr. Abraham Lincoln. The 'proof' for Lincoln's sexual tendencies is based on the facts that (a) Lincoln slept with a man in the same bed in a boarding house, (b) Lincoln was upset about this same man's unfortunate demise, (c) Lincoln wrote of this tragedy in letters he penned. On this basis scholars and political pederasts such as Andrew Sullivan have decided that Lincoln was undoubtedly homosexual, or bisexual, or sexually ambivalent. Sullivan, the former so-called Republican, has now found deeper meaning and piety in his espousal of John "I have a smarter plan" Kerry and Democrats, insinuating his pro-gay opinions on left-wing television and in newspaper columns. (One is reminded of the epithets surrounding Dr. Samuel Johnson's sobriquet about women and dogs -- it seems we are now deluged with the prevalent view that somehow one's sexual preference determines erudition, or intelligence, or in the case of ALEXANDER of Macedon, greatness! [Aside from Quentin Tarantino's titillating recent bio epic with errors such as: the wrong elephants (African not Indian), the omission of the novel adjustment of the length of the sarissas in the phalanx by Alexander, the glossing over of Alexander's many marriages in favor of many fictional affairs with Hephaiston, etc. -- I am sure enlightened and erudite individuals in Secaucus NJ or Gdansk Poland will find this an awesome work.]

What's next, a critical look at all beings based on supposed sexual history? (What do we say of Tarzan & Jane? Is Jane into bestiality with Cheetah and his primate friends? Is author X a fine writer because he is a avowed "metrosexual" or because he reads the NYer?)

Is this the new 'blacklisting' of all individuals?

Is importance or status now the domain of sexual proclivity?

Isn't it enough that we have prurient television and media including brilliant nonentities such as QUEER EYE FOR THE STRAIGHT GUY and the sophomoric but at times slightly amusing WILL AND GRACE and the comments of the above-named Mr. Sullivan and his rabid ilk to influence our daily lives?

And just what are they trying to influence?

Certainly we are a much more 'complete' society with notable contributions from writers, poets, movie actors, music composers, and artists without Labeling them this or that. Certainly it is interesting to speculate on the proclivities of famous individuals. Certainly it is the stuff of gossip, notoriety, and fodder for books and investigative television journals.

Imagine if we 'looked into' the private (purposely using the word 'private' because of the recent brouhaha and contretemps over one William Jefferson Clinton) lives of say Queen Catherine of Russia and her numerous equine stories; or what about the respected and revered Eleanor Roosevelt and her alleged lesbian lovers; or what about Will Shakespeare (for anyone who wrote so magnificently must surely be GAY or at least BI)?

For the writer Gore Vidal everyone is or should be GAY. Perhaps that is why his relative Al Gore did his best 'Myra Breckinridge' imitation in the 2000 American election. Andrew Sullivan has turned against his supposed core beliefs for greater exposure, celebrity and the approval of the leftist media. So much for core beliefs when elections or political agendas don't go the gay way.

Men and women like Lincoln, Alexander, Eleanor R, and Catherine the Great were interesting because of their uniqueness, because of their personalities, because of their individual proclivities and eccentricities -- they certainly need no 'help' in the form of evangelistic theosis by moribund semiliterate illogicians trying to be controversial or appear enlightened.

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