Betsy DeVos Nicknames
Betsy DeVos Quotes
Betsy DeVos Jokes by SNL, Samantha Bee, Sandra Bernhard, Zach Braff, Stephen Colbert, Jimmy Fallon, Josh Groban, Colin Jost, Jimmy Kimmel, Seth McFarlane, Kate McKinnon, Seth Meyers, Piers Morgan, Trevor Noah, Conan O'Brien, Henry Winkler, Danny Zuker and Others
This page contains the best Betsy DeVos nicknames, jokes and quotes that I have been able to find, plus a few that I came up with myself ...
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Betsy DeVos knows how to buy her way into power. During her confirmation hearing Diva DeVos admitted that she gave around $200 million to Republican senators who voted in her favor. But what does the Vice Principal know about education? Ditzy DeVos knows "potential" grizzly bears are a far greater danger to students than actual guns in schools! Next question?
Why would Trump pick someone so unqualified for such an important position? Well, as Trump said during his campaign, "I love the poorly educated."
The Top Ten Betsy DeVos Nicknames
Deaducation Secretary DeVos
Drekretary of Deaducation
Madame De Voucher
Ditzy DeVos (Donald Trump)
Betsy DeVos is the Drek-retary of Dead-ucation because she pushed to force kindergartners and grade-schoolers to enter unsafe schools, when adults have been unable to practice social distancing effectively. Apparently, Betsy DeVos is not smarter than a fifth-grader. The Clemson and LSU national football championship squads can't field teams, with 30+ players each testing positive for COVID-19. The super-conditioned athletes of the Nashville SC can't take the soccer field. Mike Trout, the greatest baseball player of his generation, may skip an abbreviated 2020 season. Since adults can't reopen businesses safely, how can we expect children to go back to school safely? And yet The Peach with the Bleach and a Brain out of Reach and his cohort Betsy DeVil DeVos are trying to make kindergartners and grade-schoolers do what adults can't! How is that not premeditated murder?
Dis-Honorable Mention Betsy DeVos Nicknames
Betsy De Gross
Fact-Free Betsy (Michael R. Burch)
Stuporwoman (Michael R. Burch)
The Wicked Witch of the West Wing
Little Miss Trumpet
The Education Terminator
The Segregationist (Randi Weingarten pointed out that private school vouchers are "only slightly more polite cousins of segregation")
The Semi-Polite Slighter (Michael R. Burch)
The Chalk Closet Racist
The Do Harm Schoolmarm
The Vice Principle
Secretary of Sledge-ucation
The Cold Medalist (Michael R. Burch)
The Prim & Proper Propagandist
Trump's SpokesToady (Michael R. Burch)
Trump's Dreckretary of Deaducation (Michael R. Burch)
Betsy Antoinette ("Let the children eat bullets!")
Wet Nurse Ratched
Bottom of the Barrel
The Trump Whisperer
The Trump Hisser
The Trump Enabler
The Trump Fixer
The Wall Nut
The Best Betsy DeVos Jokes and Quotes
I will refer back to Senator Enzi and the school he was talking about in Wyoming. I think probably there, I would imagine that there is probably a gun in the schools to protect from potential grizzlies. — Betsy DeVos
When the U.S. Senate failed to confirm Betsy DeVos as education secretary in a 50-50 deadlocked vote, Mike Pence became the first vice president in history to break a Senate tie over a Cabinet nomination. This produced a number of wisecracks by late-night comedians ...
It was actually a 50-50 tie vote that was broken by the vice president. Which makes the vote for education secretary the only place where a 51 is a passing grade. — Jimmy Fallon
There are a hundred senators and she only got the votes of half of them. So her first act is to make 50% a passing grade. — Stephen Colbert
In Washington today, there was no victory parade for President Trump’s pick to run the Department of Education. The Democrats pulled an all-nighter in the Senate to try to get one more Republican to vote against her. They could not do that, and Betsy DeVos squeaked in 51-50, which is terrible news for Democrats and even worse news for grizzly bears. — Jimmy Kimmel
Today, the Senate officially confirmed Betsy DeVos as education secretary, with a vote of 51 to 50. Or as Trump calls that, “a landslide.” — Jimmy Fallon
It’s come out that Education Secretary Betsy DeVos, who many think is unqualified, gave big contributions to half the Republican Senators who voted for her. Or, as Betsy DeVos calls it, “75 percent of them.” — Conan O’Brien
Samantha Bee on Full Frontal:
Pence: "WE WILL CUT THE BABY IN HALF!"
Clerk: "Um, we just need you to cast a tie-breaking vote."
Pence: "IN HALF!!!"
Betsy DeVos confirmed. What is also confirmed is that there is not one single man of courage in the Republican Congress. — Seth McFarlane
The swamp is being drained and filled with a Chuck E. Cheese sea of plastic balls. — Josh Groban
Stephen Colbert referred to DeVos as the "woman ahead of you at Starbucks with a complicated order." He said there was a "tiny chance that money played a role" in her confirmation. "How much money can she give to each senator to make sure public schools get less?" he added.
Congratulations Betsy, you're the new pilot of the Hindenburg! Gotta light? — Stephen Colbert (pointing out that Republicans were trying to junk the Department of Education at the time Betsy DeVos was so narrowly confirmed)
Stephen Colbert gave an example of "elementary math" under DeVos. "Q: Ned and Sheryl each have 4 apples. Who has more apples? A: Whomever Mike Pence decides has more apples."
A terrible moment in US history to confirm such an incompetent person as #Devos a total rejection of logic or concern for education. — Sandra Bernhard
"For $200,000,000 you can have whatever job you want," tweeted actor Zach Braff, referring to the DeVos family's alleged donation of $200 million to the Republican party, a number DeVos herself acknowledged was possibly accurate during her confirmation hearing.
Jimmy Fallon said Trump gave the reason he picked DeVos when he said, "I love the poorly educated."
Seth Meyers brought up Mike Pence casting the unusual tie-breaking vote to nominate her. "And if you don't know what that means you're probably Betsy DeVos," he said. Meyers jokingly pretended to be DeVos: "I got confirmed? Well that's terrible news ... Oh that's good news?"
America has a new Education Secretary who wants guns in schools to protect kids from Grizzly Bears — who've never attacked kids in schools. — Piers Morgan
Grizzlies .... run for the hills! — Henry Winkler
By supporting the magnificently incompetent Devos the GOP has earned its place as the most cowardly party in US history. We won't forget! — Danny Zuker
America’s education secretary made a disastrous appearance on 60 Minutes. Kate McKinnon of Saturday Night Live, playing DeVos in an interview with Colin Jost on the Weekend Update segment, had the perfect explanation for DeVos’s epic face plant: “I think the problem is that the words coming out of my mouth were bad, and I think that’s because they were coming from my brain. ... I may not be very good on camera, but behind the scenes my ideas are much worse!”
A snowstorm in the Northeast today caused many schools in the area to close. Said Betsy DeVos, “What? The school closures weren’t supposed to start yet.” — Seth Meyers
You just know DeVos only wants to be Secretary of Education so she can trap some of those kids in her gingerbread house. — @MykaFox
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